Life Goals

Well after ten years I have finally accomplished one of my goals in life.

First let’s discuss how this goal came about. Many of you (or just me) may have read my earlier post on playing the bass and being in bands. Well long ago when Marc, Jamel and I started jamming we got a bottle of champagne and placed it in our fridge in the band room. We vowed to never open it until the day we made a real album. And it stayed chilled in there during every practice and every week we would get together, jam and hone our skills. Jamel eventually brought his Nintendo 64 down one week and after jamming we would play that a bit and Jam more. We would write some corny song (Black Cadillac), play the Nintendo 64 WWF wrestling game we became hooked on and then jam some more ever waiting to crack that cham-pag-nya.  At first a curse the 64 eventually became a blessing because it allowed us to drop off from the frustration of writing to fight a hard core bikini match royal rumble (don’t ask, well if you want ask) and then get back to creating with a fresh, happy and humorous mind. PLUS it always assured Jamel would show up to practice!

At one point in my life I was basically homeless (through no fault of my own) and Marc let me stay at his place until I could get on my feet and a place of my own.  Me and him would occasionally go to “the room” as we called it (was our jam room not as dirty as it actually sounds…) and jam out a bit and write some stuff. We would open the little fridge to get a drink and look at the bottle in there waiting to be cracked open while we listened to our album. Sometimes we would go out and rent a game for the 64 and play it down there because just sitting in the area doing ANYTHING made us feel like we were making musical progress. One night we rented this new game “Conkers Bad Fur Day” and stayed down there for like 5 hours just playing this insanely ridiculous, funny game about a dirty, vulgar squirrel in a cartoon land and as one played the other would write or jam a bit. Always cracking the fridge, looking and smiling when we look at that bottle.

Well I think Marc drank the Champagne in a lonely stupor one night and passed out in the room. But about 10 years later and let me tell you if I had that bottle I would shake it, crack it and drink up the foam because I have officially completed a goal……

I FINALLY FUCKING BEAT CONKERS BAD FUR DAY!!!!! We rented that game that night and played about the first 3^rd of it then had to bring it back to blockbuster. I wanted to rent it again but they took it off the shelves due to its content. I could NOT find it in a store to buy and it literally disappeared from the world. Years later it never left my mind and I would attempt to download emulators and play through a rom but it was never really the same, until now. To run an emulator a computer needs to be about 10 times the power of the initial system. I put Project64 on a spare laptop from work, loaded the rom I have had for about 7 years and played through it. I even was able to use my old save file. Everytime I would start this game and get about a 3^rd through then have to stop for some reason but This time in the span of about 6 years I finally finished it!

The fucking game is amazingly retarded and has quite a strong underground following. It was eventually rereleased on XBOX as Conkers Live and Reloaded but was highly censored by Microsoft for whatever reason so I never got it. But now after FULLY finishing the true blue N64 version I am going to get a copy of the original XBOX version and play it on my 360.

Im not going into the story of the game but I will supply a wiki link but this game parodies classic film and television from terminator, to Dracula and even the MATRIX (the matrix level is hysterically fun!).

Watching these little cartoon characters vulgarly spew lines is for some reason the most rewarding experience and the fourth wall elements of the game just make you love this squirrel. I would LOVE a fully re mastered, un edited version on PSN but hey I’ll take what I can get because the XBOX version even though censored has insanely better graphics and as I can proudly say I finished the real one; playing the newer version won’t be so bad.

If you would love to see a Conker remake or even hell a sequel shoot over a comment and maybe we can start something.

Which would you like?